Letters from Fr. Louie

1. Christmas Day, 2002

Dear Friends,

    I send greetings this Christmas Day.  I have been trying to keep up with those who have written or sent cards.  I am presently about 100 behind.  People ask me why I don't have someone send a form letter out, but I like the personal contact.  I did try to have a half-page "card" copied, but it was intercepted at the commisary, where we could have something duplicated for 13 cents a copy.  I had to go before the captain who said it was "soliciting" because I thanked people for their "support."  I then changed it to mainly quotes from Isaiah expecting "the Messiah, the prince of peace" that still was rejected, in fact even church bells seemed too offensive and I was told to just write personal notes that said Merry Christmas...  So I have written lots of personal notes.

    I am writing this letter not in response to others but to share my feelings this Christmas Day.  Obviously this is not a "normal"
Christmas for me, even though it is "usual" for most of my fellow inmates.  It does remind me of a Thanksgiving weekend I spent in  the Nye County jail in Beatty, Nevada for action at the Nevada Test Site.

    The hard part here for me is to see the hardship this life is for the men who are in for many years for nonviolent crimes that do not seem to merit in any way the enormous sentences.  Most of them have children and miss them with a deep and aching heart.  The children are also deprived the presence of a loved parent.  I am privileged to have visitors, so I often see the anguish lived out in the visiting room.

    During Advent time I have been concentrating a lot on the Prophet Isaiah and the predictions of the Messiah who is to come and
establish a reign of Peace.  I have had the good fortune to be asked by the Chaplain to share Gospel reflections at the Sunday liturgies.  He usually gives some words in Spanish and then I reflect in English.  We have looked at the Messianic signs, the poor hear glad tidings, the blind see, the captives are set at liberty, the lame walk, the prisoners are set free (Isaiah 61/Luke 4).  Obviously this year I was most struck by the Messianic sign "prisoners are set free."  Is that not a desirable and achievable goal, at least here at the level of a federal prison camp?  I asked the chaplain if he thought the society would be in any greater danger if all of those in these camps were sent home and he responded he did not think so.  In fact their presence in some cases might make communities safer.

    This being Christmas, in addition to the "midnight Mass" we had at 6:00 PM (before 9:00 PM count), we had an interchristian service on Christmas morning.  This included the camp Full Gospel choir, their minister the Chaplain and myself.  I was somewhat awed that I would be able to share with the larger camp Christian body in the Camp Theater.  I was not sure if the Warden or other officials might be there.  I spent a good deal of time thinking about what should be said this Christmas morning here at Nellis Prison Camp.  I stared out the window of our bathroom in the very early hours of the morning, looking at the Quadrangle I was aware that we are in a prison.  Looking just beyond at the light posts and triple fences I was aware that we are in the midst of bunkers, including large storages of nuclear weapons.  We are on an air base constantly preparing for our next war.  I could also look beyond the bombing range to the site of the Nevada Test Site and recall the spectre of the nuclear arms race.  As I observed all of this I knew I would only speak about the coming of the Messiah into the midst of such violence.  So I did.  I spoke of the Messianic signs (fortunately the minister had chosen Isaiah 9 for his text which promises the coming of the "prince of peace" in the context of attending to the injustices of the poor and setting prisoners free).  I asked the men there if they saw these signs being realized.  Then asked if it would help to set prisoneres free and I received a unanimous approval (thunderous applause).  We then spoke of a better way of using the $400 billion budget for military, and the need to "turn swords into plowshares."  I commented on the witness and passing of Phil Berrigan.  They were impressed that he could carry the weight of 11 years in prison.  I also spoke of the need for all of us to take seriously the call of the Gospel to be peacemakers, starting with the violence in our hearts, commended them on the nonviolent ways they treat each other here--even "looking our for" each other (or as Paul would say "bearing one anothers'
burdens").  What I said was well received.  The guys here really like hearing from another inmate (even a very short timer).  But it also allowed me to speak to the madness and wrongness I experience here continuously amidst all of this violence.  I hope it can touch in them in some way a commitment to dedicate themselves (and me) to "setting things right" as Jesus calls us to do.

    I am down to the last couple weeks of my short three months.  In many ways I will miss the inmates here.  They have become friends, fellow travelers, brothers.  I will not miss the dehumanizing that happens in this system.  I am determined to do what I can to address the injustices done within the Federal Prison system with the bane of mandatory minimums, lack of parole and overuse of conspiracy and "ratting out" one's associates.  I must admit I am not at all repentant of my offense.  I hope to be able to repeat it again in many ways of protest.  My three months in this environment has deepened my awareness of the violence that exists in this American Superpower and my determination to give my life to witness a transition to the nonviolence Jesus shares with us as he comes into the world once again.

2. Christmas Night

    Hope you are well and had a good Christmas.  I had a very nice day.  We had a Mass last night at 6:00 PM and then an ecumenical service today in the Camp Theater.  We had a huge midday meal (I don't eat the meat so had a tray full of sweets!)

    I have had good visits with all my new-found brothers here, and some phone visiting with my family.  The enclosed (Letter #1, Christmas Day)is a reflection on the day mostly in the context of what I spoke at the Ecumenical service.  It was the result of much thought and reflection and expresses where my attention finds its focus after the months I have been here.  I was very happy to have this opportunity to speak thus before 100+ of my fellow inmates in an open religious service.  It resolved the doubts of anyone who heard me that I have in any way "repented" or "learned my lesson."  The men here are almost all very aware of our action.  I feel very grateful for the opportunity on Christmas Day to speak of my conviction for what we did and continue to do.  I was also especially happy to be able in this setting to speak of Phil Berrigan and the price he has paid to give witness to nuclear weapons which he reaffirmed in his final message are "the scourge of the earth."  There is perhaps nowhere that we could find more dramatic for this message than here amidst nuclear bunkers across from the Nevada Nuclear Test Site, truly the scourge of the earth.

    I have very mixed feelings as I leave.  Glad to be out of this system, eager to return to friends, parishioners, associates, friars,
and street folk in the Tenderloin.  But I will surely miss the new brotheres, the dynamics that exist here and particularly struggling with them to understand and address the violence they experience in this system and its relationship to the violence about to occur in
Iraq, does occur in places like Palestine, and looms over our heads as we pursue arming space for Global domination.  (A sign just as you enter our camp identifies the Red Horse Munitions Squadron and states: "Our mission: Global domination.")

    You can see I am still full of the emotions expressed in the accompanying letter... to share a significant experience for me in
this prison sentence... 

    I will be released January 10 Friday...  Then I will return to San Francisco Saturday January 18.  Look forward hopefully to seeing you Sunday January 19 at Mass at Saint Boniface.

Fondly,
Louie

3. December 29

    A short sequel to already too many pages.  The day after Christmas I was called in by the captain.  He asked me who said Mass in the chapel last Sunday--I said Fr. Frank, the Chaplain.  He said that's not what he heard.  He asked how many times I had said Mass here.  I responded never (true).  He then asked what I did at Mass.  I told him I shared reflections on the scriptures as the inmates do at Protestant services.  He responded he "had all he needed to know."

    The next day I was transferred out of my job at the chapel.  I am now an orderly for the educational building.  I presume the two actions are connected, but can't really know this.  I also presume it is my reflections, now saying Mass, are what disturbs them.

    It reminds me of many years ago in the 70's here in Vegas when I was banned from saying Mass in the base chapel by the base commander because of my sermons.  So speaking truth to power has its consequences.

    I am still very grateful I was able to reach my inmate brothers with the few minutes I had each week to offer Messianic hope.  I am very happy for Christmas morning, even if I don't speak again.  Actually I have only 12 days to go so the shift will not make a very dramatic difference.

Peace,
Louie